Clean white undies and a self-satisfied hiss

In science fiction you prepare for the interminable journey to distant galaxies by putting on clean white undies and climbing into a capsule with a clear plastic top. It closes with a self-satisfied hiss. You nod off and wake up, still clean, with new worlds in sight. I want that journey.

Emirates try very hard but I envy the unconscious. No quantity of red wine and food in nifty little containers can compensate for the grittiness of cattle-class travel for 9 hours.

For those following the travails of their favourite claustrophobe, Lyn succeeded in closing the A380 toilet door but couldn’t bring herself to lock it. I loyally stood guard.

What does compensate you for modern air travel is layovers at airport hotels. They even supply the clean white garments. Our journey continues tonight.